The information contained in this website is for entertainment purposes only. The information is provided by the author make no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability or availability with respect to the website or the information, products, services, or related graphics contained on the website for any purpose. Any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk.
In no event will the author be liable for any loss or damage including without limitation, indirect or consequential loss or damage, or any loss or damage whatsoever arising from loss of data or profits arising out of, or in connection with, the use of this website.
Through this website you are able to link to other websites which are not under the control of the author. The author have no control over the nature, content and availability of those sites. The inclusion of any links does not necessarily imply a recommendation or endorse the views expressed within them.
Every effort is made to keep the website up and running smoothly. However, the author takes no responsibility for, and will not be liable for, the website being temporarily unavailable due to technical issues beyond our control.
I just don't have time...
Friday, November 30, 2007
A lot has happened for the past 2 weeks. I really wanted to update this blog nut didn't have the opportunity to do so. Since i changed my job, my time are mostly spent in the office without any tendency to surf nor to browse any of my favorites websites. That includes reading emails. Every time wanted to update my blog, there is always something else to do. Spend most of my weekends outside rather sitting at home sitting on the couch and be lazy asshole i am.
Yep, again, work...maybe someday...i will find the stability of time where can be spent fairly on everything. Right now, my focus is get paycheck and pay the debt that is getting more and more....
On sunday, i received a call from my father saying that my auntie is in HUKM due to critical illness. She's been admitted to ICU and no relatives can enter. So, i felt there is no point of going if i can't see my aunt. I thought that everything will be fine as soon as she's being transfered to the normal ward, i will visit her. But my wish didn't come true, after 24 hours transfered to normal ward, she passed away. That time was early in the morning on monday.
Just ready to go to work, my father called and said my aunt passed away that morning. Her diagnosis stated that her blood become poisonous. Her liver and appendix working fine, it just simply it stop functioning for few hours. While doing the dialysis, after 9 hours, her body rejected the process, and my aunt passed away. :-( very unfortunate for me, i haven't got any chance to see her for the pass year even for this raya eve.
She is one of my beloved aunties. She was a teacher in terengganu state where she born and grew. Finally, we took my late auntie and bury her in the same cemetery that my late grandmother and uncle are buried. May god forgive her sins and place her among the pious people.
Even i'm sad, i received a job offer in one of the biggest MNC in the world. That happened when i was driving towards terengganu escorting my late auntie. Partially i'm happy. As i remembered a saying "when god close you a door, He opens you a window". I believe in that since everything happens in life have its reason behinds it.
Today, i tendered my resignation with immediate effect. My lady boss doesn't took it well since she is not well versed with someone going off immediately and the hiring company willing to pay the 2 months notice. LoL...the face that old fart gave is priceless. She was speechless and only know to say "need to follow procedure"...i did say i followed the procedure but she insisted that i'm not. By the way, i won the argument after she called the HR manager to know the procedure. I'm already off the hook you stupid old hag.
13) When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in Mexico, its ads were supposed to have read, "It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you." The company thought that the word "embarazar" (to impregnate) meant to embarrass, so the ad read: "It won't leak in your pocket and make you pregnant." 12) Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in an American campaign: "Nothing Sucks like an Electrolux."
11) Clairol introduced the "Mist Stick," a curling iron, into Germany only to find out that "mist" is slang for manure. Not too many people had use for the "Manure Stick."
10) Coors put its slogan, "Turn It Loose," into Spanish, where it was read as "Suffer From Diarrhea." 9) Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into "Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese 8) When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the US, with the smiling baby on the label. Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures on the labels of what's inside, since many people can't read. 7) Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of a notorious porno magazine.
6) Frank Perdue's chicken slogan, "It takes a strong man to make a tender chicken," was translated into Spanish as "it takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate."
5) When American Airlines wanted to advertise its new leather first class seats in the Mexican market, it translated its "Fly In Leather" campaign literally, which meant "Fly Naked" (vuela en cuero) in Spanish.
4) An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope" (el Papa), the shirts read "I Saw the Potato" (la papa).
3) The Dairy Association's huge success with the campaign "Got Milk?" prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon brought to their attention the Spanish translation read "Are You Lactating?"
2) General Motors had a very famous fiasco in trying to market the Nova car in Central and South America. "No va" in Spanish means, "It Doesn't Go".
1) The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Kekoukela", meaning "Bite the Wax Tadpole" or "Female Horse Stuffed with Wax", depending on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a phonetic equivalent "kokoukole", translating into "Happiness in the Mouth."
I have a garage in which I must say does not really impress nor neat. It is a just a plain concrete as the floor for my garage, it look like a mess. When it stained with oil, nothing that i can do to clean it up since my concrete does absorb oil stains. There is an alternative where you can overcome those problems at the same time making your garage look extra neat and tidy. Garage floors come in various types and designs. Important thing is, it is cost effective as well as easy to install.
Oh my Oh my~ look at the time...5.30 to go back...got lot of things to do...pay bike installment and then pick up gf's ring at midvalley, give money to mom and then dinner with gf. Now thats what i had in mind yesterday. As planned went to midvalley, buy myself a delicious deli france bread in which i don't know the hell of its name...still yummy...went to down to the motorcycle parking bay...with smile on my face thinking seeing my gf...
Since the massive renovation and construction, the path has changed dramatically...so i get confused, strolling along the road then i hit the speed bump in a decent speed of 40kmh and there i go flying off my bike. As any other accidents, it happens so fast, but it the split second, i did thought of something "shit!i'm gonna break my neck" "why i haven't stop rolling?"...thats the thing running through my head. "Why i haven't stop rolling?" what the fuck shit was i thinking?...
Fortunately for me, while i'm still in shock lying on the road...a boy helped me...he claimed that i was not the one had an accident over there because people hardly can see the speed bump due to the lighting and the colour of the speed bump. Just imagine this...the lights are yellow-oranges, the speed bump is yellow coloured...so...calculate all the possibilities...no one can see the shitty speed bump...Now that is hazardous...very dangerous for motorcyclist. Today i woke up with bumps and bruises on my body...stupid fuck...luckily my bike doesn't sustained heavy damages. Just broken signal lights and some scratch on its coverset...
For those who ever use that exit...please be careful...i had my share...don't let yourself share the same pain...
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Your EX-Wife
Dear Ex-Wife,
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother...was born Carla.
Everybody in this world needs a job to earn in order to survive. Who doesn't need a job? Unless you are the sons and daughters of billionaire or royalty. Conventional way of applying for a job or few jobs cost you money. I remembered when there was no online jobs portal. We had to send all those resumes and other copy of certificates via normal post and if you're not lucky, the mail envelope lost in its delivery process. Not to mention, it took few weeks before it arrives to the recipient.
In any case, i would never want to go back in time and go through that process again. I'm lucky because i'm born in the year that technology started to advance and many great things happen thanks to technology. The effect does not only felt by job seekers but also employers. Nowadays a lot of hiring organization choose online jobs portal to post their vacancy within their organizations in job listing. Conventional way of putting an ads on the paper to inform vacancies really cost money. Online jobs portal has effectively eliminate irrelevant costs.
Monster.ca offers a lot of functionality that employers and job seekers can take advantage of. For example, resume builder-an easiest way to start compose an effective resume. If you have your own resume that you to upload, there's an option where can upload it. Finding the company's information is easy using Monster.ca companies profile. Job seekers can know what is the company's business.
Through job listing, job seekers can browse for the job they are interested. As for hiring organizations, they get more applications and may get experts they need for the job. Now both benefits from jobs portal by save time, costs and efforts. As for employers they get added value where the applications are presented in organized way, no longer misplacement or flooding their desk with applications.
Soalan Licik, Jawapan Cerdik Seorang guru, Cikgu Murni (Umur: 22) menghadapi masalah dengan salah seorang muridnya (Abu). Lalu guru ini bertanya kepada murid tersebut : "Apa sebenarnya masalah awak, Abu?"
Lalu Abu menjawab, "Saya terlalu cerdik untuk berada di darjah 4, kakak saya menduduki UPSR dan saya lebih cerdik dari dia, maka saya seharusnya berada di tempat yang sama juga!".
Cikgu Murni dah tak tertahan. Dia bawa Abu ke pejabat pengetua. Sementara Abu menunggu di ruang tamu, Cikgu Murni terangkan keadaan tersebut kepada pengetua. Pengetua mengatakan yang dia akan berikan ujian kepada Abu dan jika Abu gagal menjawab, maka Abu harus kekal di darjah 3 dan berkelakuan baik. Abu dibawa masuk ke pejabat Pengetua dan Cikgu Murni terangkan pada Abu dan Abu bersetuju untuk ambil ujian yang akan diberikan.
Pengetua: Apa 3 x 3? Abu: 9 Pengetua: Apa 6 x 6? Abu: 36
Pengetua terus bertanyakan soalan2 berdasarkan tahap pencapaian murid2 UPSR dan si Abu mampu menjawab tiap soalan yang diberikan. Lalu pengetua memandang Cikgu Murni dan berkata, "Saya rasa murid ini sepatutnya berada di darjah 6", Lalu Cikgu Murni berkata pada pengetua, "Saya ada soalan saya sendiri, boleh tak saya ajukan pada Abu?". Pengetua dan Abu bersetuju.
Cikgu Murni: Apa yang lembu ada 4 di badan, tapi saya cuma ada dua? Abu: (berfikir) Kaki
Cikgu Murni: Apa yang ada di dalam seluar kamu tapi tidak pada seluar saya? Abu: Saku
Cikgu Murni: Apa yang bermula dengan huruf "K" akhir dengan "A", ianya berbulu, berbentuk oval, nyaman dan mengandungi lapisan nipis keputihan? Abu: Kelapa
Cikgu Murni: Apakah yang masuk keras dan berwarna "pink", bila keluar lembik dan melekit? Mata Pengetua terbuka luas dan sebelum sempat dia menahan, siAbu terus menjawab. Abu: Gula-gula getah (Bubblegum)
Cikgu Murni: Apa yang mereka lakukan, lelaki secara berdiri, wanita secara duduk dan anjing secara tiga kaki? Mata Pengetua sekali lagi terbuka sangat2 luas dan sebelum dia sempat hendak menahan si Abu terus menjawab. Abu: Bersalaman
Cikgu Murni: Baik, sekarang saya akan ajukan soalan berbentuk siapakah saya, okay? Abu: Baik Cikgu
Cikgu Murni: Awak memasukkan batang kedalam saya. Awak ikat saya untuk saya berdiri. Saya kebasahan sebelum awak. Pengetua kelihatan resah dengan soalan yang diajukan oleh Cikgu Murni. Abu: Khemah
Cikgu Murni: Jari memasuki saya. Awak menggesel-gesel saya bila awak teringatkan saya. Lelaki idaman akan mendapat saya dulu. Pengetua semakin resah dan tidak selesa. Lantas terus meneguk segelas Nescafe 3in1. Abu: Cincin perkahwinan
Cikgu Murni: Saya ada bermacam-macam saiz. Bila saya sakit saya akan meleleh. Bila saya keluar, banyak tisu yang akan digunakan. Bila awak hembuskan saya, akan berasa lega. Sekali lagi pengetua rasa amat resah dengan soalan yang di ajukan oleh Cikgu Murni dan ingin membantah, tapi si Abu mendahuluinya. Abu: Hidung
Cikgu Murni: Saya batang yang keras. Hujungnya tajam. Saya akan datang dan masuk dengan lajunya. Abu: Anak panah
Cikgu Murni: Sekarang saya akan ajukan soalan dalam Bahasa Inggeris, okay? Abu: Okay
Cikgu Murni: What word starts with a 'F' and end in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement? Abu: Firetruck
Cikgu Murni: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if you dont get it you have to use your hand. Abu: Fork
Cikgu Murni: What is it that all men have one of. It's longer on some men than on others, the pope does not use his, and a man gives it to his wife after they are married? Abu: Surname
Cikgu Murni: What part of the man has no bones but has muscles, lots of veins and loves pumping? Abu: Heart
Pengetua menghembuskan nafas kelegaan bila mendengar jawapan yang diberikan oleh si Abu, lantas berkata "Baik hantar murid ini ke Universiti Malaya; jawapan yang saya fikirkan semuanya salah".
P/s: Jika jawapan anda semua salah, anda adalah sama spesies dengan pengetua yang mempunyai pemikiran kuning.....hehehe
Name: kraken Home: Malaysia About Me: I don't need to tell u about me...I'm just a regular malaysian who loves to talk crap and filled with profanities. Vulgar words is my speciality...Enjoy with an open heart or you can go drop dead~ Profile: Don't expect much
